LONDON/HONG KONG – On a recent trancontinental flight from London Heathrow to Hong Kong, married flight attendant Katya Smurfree and pilot Jonathan Slitherington locked eyes across the aisle.
The two smiled at each other, before swiftly returning to their duties aboard their monstrous A-380 flying phallic symbol.
This shared smile was fleeting, but spoke volumes. And later, when Katya and Jonathan were on break at the same time, the couple found themselves sitting in the onboard crew lounge, reflecting on the shared life and careers they’ve built together, and also on Jonathan’s burgeoning manhood.
“I met you for five minutes on the airplane when I wasn’t even supposed to, and now we’re living in the city together, and you’re sitting across from me on the plane and we’re working together,” Jonathan recalls saying to Katya.
“You never think when you meet someone for the first time that you’re just going to immediately get stuck into some seriously heavy fellatio,” Katya replied.
How Katya and Jonathan got here was via a series of unexpected moments and decisions starting six years ago, in 2017. Back then, Katya was basically incapacitated by a lifelong love for letting anything slip into her crotch, and Jonathan was working as a host for his own YouTube program, “Booze Crooz,” where he would take unwitting tourists on a flight in his Cessna 172 while fully intoxicated and see where they ended up.
“One time, I was so obliterated I flew straight to Conakry, Guinea. Although I crash-landed the Cessna and we all were infected with Guinea worm disease caused by the parasite Dracunculus medinensis, it was I who realized I was the real Draculan parasite and needed to be stopped immediately.”
It was then that both Katya and Jonathan flipped their life narratives to turn their respective obsessions with dick and booze into lifelong careers where they could each indulge freely in their passions but under the guise of plausibly reputable airline professionals who can each somehow maintain a patina of stability while working trans-oceanic flights.
“In the end, we are each chasing our dreams: me and my seemingly endless captain’s cock worship and Jonathan and his love of flying arseholed with a plane-load of international passengers with latent death wishes,” Katya said.
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