CHINA-OCCUPIED HONG KONG – The newly installed CEO of English-language broadsheet The South China Morning Post vowed on Friday that he would “not now or ever” become a stooge of the mainland Chinese government he has already implicitly pledged forever loyalty to as an employee of the Chinese state-sanctioned company that wholly owns the newspaper he now nominally runs.
The CEO, Mo Chung, pledged that he would never stoop to the level of carryng Beijing’s water by running stories like this one, this one, and most soitenly not this one in future print or online iterations of the SCMP, adding that the paper would instead focus on currying favor with its highly valued readership vertical through more thought leadership articles like this one, which are proving wildly popular to the youthful, home-grown apparatchik base that has taken root in the former British colony.
“These stories are the lifeblood of what the newly reconfigured SCMP is all about,” Chung told BIA in an exclusive interview. “By cleverly subverting the context of the China-Hong Kong relationship through the mindless repetition of CCP talking points, our readers will come to enjoy what mainland citizens have known for years: kicking back and taking it all in without so much as raising a fuss or demonstrating by the millions on city streets will surely lead to a win-win situation wherein nobody really has to be imprisoned for the rest of their lives in a black jail for saying that Commies blow.”
Chung denied that he could be considered a knucklehead of the Chinese government even as he sought Beijing’s permission to name as his chief lieutenants his cousins Larry Tseng and Curly Jung, who previously had starring roles at the state-run media company The Woo-Woo-Woo-Han Times.
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