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ITV Presenter Schofield: ‘I Thought It Was Totally Normal as a Male Brit to Want to Get Blowjobs from Other Men All the Time’

LONDON – Phillip Schofield, the telly presenter for British network ITV who has admitted to diddling with a much younger male colleague whilst under the influence of latent homosexuality, said in an exclusive interview that he had been taught from a young age that his lustful desire for raging cock was completely normal given the circumstance of his being full-blown English.

Schofield told BreakingInAsia that when he had married his doting wife of 30 years, Stephanie Lowe, he had assumed his love of schlong would eventually fade to the point he could somewhat tolerate pussy. “This is what we are all taught since about Third Form,” Schofield said in referring to the school age most British males form a lifelong attachment to Master John Goodfellow. “Maintain a stiff upper lip when confronted with the female realm knowing that it is our duty to carry on the traditions of both wifely marriage and unrestrained buggery.”

“In fact,” Schofield continued, “I do recall a time when I was 100 percent committed to the family life and living out the rest of my days absolutely foresworn to even the remotest possibility that I would jump right back on the Putz Bus or revel in preferably huge Black cock.”

“I’m only deeply sorry I’ve let my family and myself down, and although having my young colleague’s cock up my arse brought me the most intense pleasure I have felt in years, I must now pick up the mantle of ‘Pretend-Heterosexual Husband’ again and just get on with it.”

“Although I assume I will never be able to present the news live on British telly ever again for the sin of having openly engaged in sexual relations with a younger, possibly underage male who was not a close relative, I will continue my life journey through the thicket of circumstance and do right by the viewing public and my family by never even thinking of cock again,” Schofield said. “Except of course when I go to random men’s rooms at the mall or countryside cottages, where I trust my instincts to do anything other than engage in bathroom acts not strictly prohibited in the Bible or by British common law will hold sway.”

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